The Holy Trinity: Love, Sex, & Tantra
This year, I made a promise to myself—and it’s a big one. When it comes to relationships, I’m done settling for men who aren’t deeply connected to their own spiritual practices. And definitely no one who isn’t ready to learn, explore, and practice Tantra with me. I’m talking about anything from meditating together daily to mastering semen retention (and everything in between).
Let’s be clear: Tantra isn’t some word I throw around to sound spiritual or enlightened. It isn’t some “aesthetic”. It’s not just sexy positions, eye-gazing, or a “bedroom trick” to try once and forget. Tantra is a lifestyle, it’s light body yoga—a deeply transformative practice that works with both your energy and physical body, alongside your mind, to heal your blocks to bliss.
So, what is Tantra—really?
It’s not a one-size-fits-all kind of thing. There are many forms of Tantra, and I practice and take refuge in the Shangpa Kagyu Lineage of Vajrayana Buddhism. Tantra means “to weave”—in our lineage, this means weaving light (visualizations), sound (mantras), and form (the body) to access your central channel, where your enlightened consciousness resides. This isn’t just about physical sensations or transcending reality—it’s the opposite. It’s about being so rooted and present in your body and your environment.
Here’s the thing: Tantra, especially Authentic Tantra, isn’t what you’ve seen marketed in the West (aka Neo Tantra) as a way to "improve your sex life" or "liberate your body." And there’s nothing wrong with that if you’re into it. But Tantra is deeper than that. It’s about using sexuality, energy, and consciousness to free yourself from suffering—and not just you, but all sentient beings. Tantra isn’t a “me” practice—it’s a “we” practice.
The Tibetan Five Elements
Let’s dive into something powerful: the Tibetan Five Elements. Each element—Earth, Water, Fire, Air, and Space—helps heal a root poison inside us:
Earth antidotes pride.
Water antidotes anger.
Fire antidotes attachment.
Air antidotes jealousy.
Space antidotes ignorance and the illusion of separation.
This is where Tibetan Five Element Tantra stands apart from just the “somatic practices” you see online today. While somatic work focuses on the physical body (aka ‘soma’), Tantra works with both the energy body and the physical body. These days, many people equate somatic with holistic—which couldn’t be further from the truth.
In my lineage, the energy body is considered superior to the physical one. All illness and wellness originate in the energy body and eventually manifest in the physical body. This is why I work with both—the energy body (through meditation) and the physical body (through pleasure).
That’s what makes Tantra so transformative—it’s truly a holistic approach that heals and awakens you on every level.
Tantra: A Way of Life
For me, Tantra isn’t just a practice—it’s how I breathe, how I love, and how I show up in the world. It’s not just about sex—it’s about connecting on every level of my being.
When you practice lineage-based Tantra, it transforms you from the inside out. You experience connection, bliss, and pleasure in a way that completely shifts your entire existence and what you thought you knew.
Once you experience the holy trinity—love, sex, and Tantra—all intertwined and connected—you can’t go back. You’ll never be the same.
